They Understand

When you're a mom, your friends are no longer just friends, they are mom friends. I refer to all my friends that have kids now as mom friends and getting together with them over coffee . . . a lot of coffee, helps me feel like I'm not on this journey alone. They get it in a way my husband doesn't and can't because he works to provide so much to our family. 

They understand feeling tired in a way you never thought possible. Getting woken up every single night. Breastfeeding alone in the dark while the rest of your house is quiet minus the heavy breathing of your spouse. 

They get it when you say the feeling you get when you look at your peacefully sleeping husband while your breasts are leaking milk as you attempt to change a diaper in the dark so you don't overstimulate the baby is anything but love. You want to suffocate him! They know you really don't.

They attend play dates at your house without judgment even though your dinner dishes are still in the sink, and there are breakfast bowls and spilled milk on the table. You answer the door in your pajamas and unwashed hair swept up in a messy ponytail. They get it. 

They bring over bagels and coffee because they know that even though it's ten o'clock, you probably haven't eaten yet.

You can vent about how your husband is driving you crazy and never picks up his clothes off the floor, ever. And when he does the dishes he never wipes off the fucking counter and always leaves that one big pot in the sink.  They know you love him anyway.

The understand your need to have a mom's night out and happily finish a bottle of wine ( okay, two) with you while you talk about everything but kids. 

They know what it's like to completely give up everything you are to be a mother and to feel so lost sometimes because you are so busy taking care of everyone else. 

When people say that being a mother isn't that hard, your mom friends are right there with you-- dark circles under their eyes and unwashed hair telling those people to fuck off. We have been there for each other through the pregnancies, sleep regressions, breast feeding struggles . . . we've seen it all. They get it. It's hard. Period.

They know the beauty of  kids having an early bedtime and why it's crucial to our sanity because they also know that no matter what time the kids go to bed their wake up time stays the same. 

When you're crying and bitching and complaining and freaking out, they listen not lecture. They know you need to vent and they know you love your family. 

I know that when I'm nursing at 3 am they probably are too and I don't feel so alone.

I know that when I'm stressed out because my house is a disaster that so is their's and it's okay to not be able to do it all.

I know that when I'm serving my kids mac and cheese for the second night this week that their kids had some turkey and a slice of cheese for dinner last week and that doesn't make us bad moms. Just busy ones. 

Motherhood is the most amazing, challenging, annoying, difficult, beautiful thing I have ever done and thanks to my mom friends and lot's and lot's of coffee, we got through it.